Thursday, November 21, 2019

Career Advice from Oprah



On this beautiful Thursday, I wanted to share an inspirational interview that Oprah participated in at Stanford University. For me, the interview was focused on career and making career decisions. This may be my limited view on it because I am at a time where I am making major career decisions.

 

My biggest takeaway from the interview is this, we are all striving to be the best and highest version of ourselves. When we find out who we are at the core, connect to our core and listen to our inner voice we inevitably become the best and highest version of ourselves and we can use this in any and every career path we choose.

 




Oprah articulated my idea of who I am and what I am here to do very clearly in this interview. I always knew that I was different from most people that I come in contact with, the way I see things differently, the way I relate to people differently and for a long time I have been afraid of that because I thought if I am not like them and I don’t think like them they won’t like me and I will miss out on the opportunity to feel like I belong which is something we all strive for. But now I am seeing clearly that, that very thing is my gift. It is my gift to the world to present and share ideas that may not be similar to yours or the people I come in contact with but I still want the people I share my ideas with to be able to hear me even if they don’t understand or cannot relate immediately. My role here on this earth is to share ideas of self-empowerment with my generation that they may not have heard of or have been exposed to. For example in my book, "Rewrite your History" – I presented the idea that the same way we can manifest good things like wealth, love and prosperity with the Law of Attraction is the same way we manifest the bad things in our lives like misery, despair and poverty with the law of attraction. The law of attraction is always working whether we know it or not, whether we believe it or not. We are attracting every interaction, every circumstance, every relationship, every job, every family circumstance, everything you can think of in your life you have attracted and are attracting.

 

Oprah mentioned intentions and credited her show becoming great because she set intentions and decided which show to choose based on the intentions of that show. When you “Rewrite your History” you become intentional about what you are attracting in your life. When you “Rewrite your History” life doesn’t just happen to you, you tell life what you want it to do in alignment with who you are. It’s like getting behind the wheel of a car to the destination of your best/highest self and directing the places where you want to go, where you stop, the snacks you buy on the way there, and everything in between. When you “Rewrite your History”, you know that you do not have to stop at the stop light that some other person created because that is not part of your route or journey to your destination to the best and highest version of yourself. Also, the fact that she mentioned listening to your inner voice a few times in the interview and how important it is gave me the validation I needed to promote “Rewrite your History” because in the book when I shared the steps to write your new story AKA “Rewrite your History,” listening to your inner voice is one of the steps I suggested. Who am I coming up with ideas that the Oprah herself finds important?

 

I am typing those words feeling like I am speaking to myself and giving myself that advice, God knows I need it now. Anyways, let me know in the comments what is coming up for you while watching the interview. I always find it interesting and fascinating the way two people may watch the same interview or listen to the same song but receive completely different messages.

BUY THE BOOK


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Monday, November 18, 2019

5 Steps To Get Rid of Ashy Skin this Winter Season


Today I am sharing my 5 step system to get rid of dry and ashy skin for the winter season. I shared a more in depth skin care post here that you might enjoy.
1. Use non-toxic shower gels, soaps and moisturizers or body lotions because nontoxic products do not have harsh chemicals that will dry out your skin.
 
2. Look for shower gels, soaps and moisturizers or body lotions that have moisturizing properties in them like oats, shea butter, coconut oil, olive oil, jojoba oil or any other moisturizing properties you can think of like @edenbodyworks ‘s trio (a body wash, body lotion and hand cream) that is infused with coconut oil, shea butter and vitamin E.








3. Use a body scrub 2 to 3 times a week
 
4. Mix your body lotion with a body oil

5. Keep a good hand cream in your handbag. I love @EdenBodyworks hand cream, not only is it moisturizing, it also smells very natural. it smells like shea butter and coconut, I cannot stop sniffing my hands every time I apply it.


This blogpost is in collaboration with Eden Body Works. When Eden Body Works reached out to me about the trio the first question I asked was are the products non-toxic. Not only did I find out that they were non-toxic, I also learned that their products are all natural and cruelty free.


Eden’s bodyworks is available at edenbodyworks.com , Walmart, Amazon, Target and Sally Beauty, Rite Aid, CVS #glowingallyear

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Tuesday, November 5, 2019

How to Style White Boots




When I initially noticed white boots trending last winter, I thought Meh… not my style, too trendy. But After seeing it for the millionth time, I wanted to give it a try. Today, I will share my tips and tricks to style and class up the white boots that I recently picked up from amazon and hopefully inspire you to give the white boots trend a try.
1. Monochromatic White 




The white after labor day conversation is for amateurs, we do not speak on that here, lol. A monochromatic look is a look that contains one color. A monochromatic look is always a win, whenever you want to look effortlessly chic and put together. White on white is super chic. When doing a monochromatic white look you can play with different textures and different shades of white.

 2. Feminine Silhouettes




Sometimes the white boots look can look like a cowgirl chic look even if the boot itself is not a cowboy boot. To make sure my white boots look does not make me look like a cowgirl, I pair it with feminine silhouettes like the skirt in the image above or the skirt suit look in the image below.

 3. Feminine Colors




When I saw Zara selling white boots for about $200, I thought it was too expensive for something that I would be limited to pairing with my white looks. However, when I got my pair of white boots from Amazon and decided to try it with feminine colors, it looked great with them.

 4. Neutral Color




White boots look amazing with other neutral colors like camel, grey, beige, and black. Personally, I would wear a monochromatic look with a neutral color and add the white boots as a pop. For example I would wear a monochromatic grey look or a monochromatic black look with the white boots.

 

Petite Girl Tip: Avoid wearing white boots with short dresses, short skirts, short pants or short jackets it will make you look even shorter.

 

Did you trying the white boots trend? If so, please share your styling tips and tricks, we would love to learn from you.

OUTFIT DETAILS

Look 1
Off White Sweater Skirt and Top: Zara
Gold Belt: Zara
Red Bag: Zac Posen

Look 2
Check Print Mini Skirt Suit: &otherstories
Golden White Wide Brim Hat: Lack of Color
Red Bag: Mackage

Look 3
Pink Coat: Tahari from Nordstrom Rack
White Hat: Lack of Color
Sunglasses: Rayban (Style: Aviator)

Look 4
White Sweater Top: Zara (Same in Look 1)
Beige Coat: Zara
Beige Bag: Zac Posen
Golden White Wide Brim Hat: Lack of Color
White Boots: Amazon
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Wednesday, October 30, 2019

Feminine Skin Care Routine for Healthy, Glowing and Radiant Skin


Gone are the days when I used to struggle with dry skin during the cooler months. Today, I am sharing my feminine skin care routine for healthy, glowing, supple and radiant skin.
















In-Shower Routine
Soap and Shower Gels: For the shower, I use a bar soap or shower gel. When buying shower soaps or shower gels, I look for non-toxic products with moisturizing properties like olive oil, oats, jojoba oil, etc. I buy my favorite bar soaps from Whole Foods, TJ Maxx, Home Goods and Amazon. I buy my shower gels from Rituals.







Body Scrubs: I love to scrub in the shower to get rid of dead skin cells and revel fresh, healthy and radiant skin. I use sugar body scrubs from Rituals.




I also scrub the skin on my vagina with a more gentle scrub from European Wax Center called Cheeky Strut. Not only does this remove dead skin cells on the skin, it also prevents ingrown hair for women who wax.



Post Shower Routine
Towel: When I get out of the shower, I pat my skin dry with a towel or allow it to air dry. I avoid rubbing the towel as this may be too hard on the skin.






Ingrown Hair Serum: When my skin is dry, I apply European Wax Center's in grown hair serum on the skin on my vagina. In addition to preventing ingrown hair, the serum also moisturizes the skin leaving it soft and supple.






Body Moisturizer: After the serum, I move on to moisturize my body with a body lotion/moisturizer. When buying moisturizers for my body I look for nontoxic products with highly moisturizing properties. My favorite body moisturizer is from lush called Charity Pot. Charity Pot is very moisturizing, nontoxic vegan and cruelty free like all lush products.






Body Oil: Finally, I use a body oil to seal the moisture in. I usually mix the body oil with my moisturizer. This combination leaves my skin, glowing and radiant.






What are some feminine techniques or products you use to keep your skin healthy, glowing and radiant? Please share in the comments, I love to discover new feminine products and techniques.






Thank you for stopping by.


Au-revoir,

Deb

WATCH THE VIDEO





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Friday, October 25, 2019

DVF Francine Colorblock Wrap Dress


The best style and fashion decision I made in 2019 was to sign up for Rent the Runway on my birthday as a birthday gift to myself. Not only does Rent the Runway make fashion affordable for me it is also a revolutionary concept for recycling. Needless to say this beautiful DVF wrap dress was a recent rent/borrow from Rent the Runway. I wore this dress to work and the men in the Financial District could not stop staring at me. The color, the material, the cut, the fact that it is wrapped makes very feminine and seductive in a very classy way. I absolutely adore this dress. I hate that I had to return it today because I need to clear my slot to borrow looks for Halloween. I am considering buying this dress. It is actually at a discount at Nordstrom rack.









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How Fibroid Changed My Life




I had fibroid removal surgery in May 2019 and the experience changed my life for the better.


For those who are not familiar with fibroid, it is a benign tumor that grows in a woman's uterus. The symptoms differ from woman to women and they include heavy bleeding, painful periods, and may affect a women's ability to get pregnant and give birth.


Wearing DVF Francine Wrap Dress
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Tuesday, October 22, 2019

Are Limiting Beliefs Affecting Your Romantic Relationships?



Today we are going to have a conversation about limiting beliefs, also known as self-defeating beliefs,  and how they affect romantic relationships. If you are a millennial, I am sure you may have heard of the term limiting belief circling around ---- If you are not a millennial do not feel left out, it will all make sense at the end. While doing research for this article, I came across the simplest definition and explanation of a limiting belief from Allison Fallon’s blog https://allisonfallon.com/limiting-beliefs/ and it reads, “a limiting belief is something you believe to be true about yourself, about others and about the world that limits you in some way. These beliefs may hold you back from taking chances, keep you blind to opportunities  in your path, prevent you from accepting gifts offered to you, or simply keep you stuck focusing on the negative aspect of your circumstances.” I really love the fact that she included this line in her article because I could not have wrote it better, “The challenge with limiting beliefs is most of us don’t think we have them and they can be really hard to spot.  In this article, I will help you to become aware of the limiting beliefs affecting your romantic relationships and get rid of them.

 
Stock Image from Pexels



How to Spot Limiting Beliefs Affecting Romantic Relationships

 

I shared my story in details about how I did this myself in my book, Rewrite your History: A Personal Guide to Freedom available on Kindle as an e-book; you can also purchase a paperback copy on Amazon. In my work on myself, I found out that the limiting beliefs affecting my romantic relationships were stemming from my parents relationship. Yours could be from your single girlfriends, a family member, an advisor, your ex, your current romantic partner or a friend you trust. It can also come from the music you listen to, the TV shows you watch or any other form of media you consume. The following is a list of some of the limiting beliefs you may have: there are no good men out there; all men are liars and cheaters; all men will cheat; (expletive) ain’t shit; men will always leave; rich men (people) are evil; I’m going to be lonely for the rest of my life.

 

This is a very limited list but if you believe any of these lines, any variation of these ideas, any negative beliefs that you have surrounding romantic relationships are limiting beliefs that will in turn create life experiences aligned with those beliefs and ideas. For example, if you believe that there are no good men out there, all the men showing up in your life experiences will behave badly or show you that they are no good because that is what you are creating in your thoughts. Those same men could go to a woman who does not have these beliefs and he will act totally different towards her. The next time you say or think something negative towards romantic relationship, ask yourself if it is something you would like to experience in your reality.

 

How to Get Rid of Limiting Beliefs Affecting Romantic Relationships

 

In order to get rid of limiting beliefs, you have to create new beliefs. But how are beliefs formed or created anyways? According to Skilled at Life (http://www.skilledatlife.com/how-beliefs-are-formed-and-how-to-change-them/) , beliefs are generally formed in two ways: by our personal life experiences, conclusions, deductions and inferences; or by accepting what others tell us to be true.” For example, if you have the belief that there aren’t any good men out there” maybe you think your father is not a good man which would be a conclusion you created based on your perception of your life experience with your father. From that belief about your father, you attracted men who are no good throughout your dating experiences. Maybe you read posts multiple times on Facebook about how bad men are which is an example of believing what someone tell us (the world on Facebook). Maybe you see how badly men behave on your favorite reality TV shows or movies and you are in turn creating the same experience in your reality.

 

How to Form New Beliefs on Romantic Relationships

 

Now that we know how to create or form a belief we are going to create empowering beliefs that will propel our romantic lives forward. I would recommend starting with repeating positive phrases about relationships to yourself. You can also form new beliefs with repetition and affirmations. The bible and most religious text teach us the power in what we speak and our thoughts. When you start to speak those words, you will start to create the positive romantic relationship experiences in your life which will serve as a form of life experience. The more you do this, the more you will create positive romantic relationship experiences and before you know it, you have created a new belief system on romantic relationships. So to do this I would recommend the following lines, any positive lines you can imagine or positive romantic experiences you want to create in your life:

  • I always have the best time on a date
  • I am in love with a man who loves, spoils and adores me
  • My man is very caring
  • Men love to spoil me
  • I am married to my dream man
In a relationship you can find creative ways to use those lines with your man, make sure it is sincere and at the right time. For example, if he brought you food from some place, you can say, honey you are so caring, thank you for feeding me. Watch how he reacts in that moment and watch him try to do more little things for you because he loves to hear those words.

 

If you are not in a relationship, you can still use those lines or any positive combinations you can come up with. When you repeat those positive, kind and loving words pay attention to your heart and how it feels. Practice is key. It took many years for you to create the beliefs you have now, it will take practice to get a new belief system on romantic relationships.

 

Consume Positive Media about Romantic Relationships

 

Finally, I would recommend consuming positive media about romantic relationships. I know it may be hard to do this and it will take a lot of will power but positive media on romantic relationships are out there and you should consider consuming more of them. I am not talking about the Disney type where your prince charming will ride on a horse to come save you, I am talking about non magical positive media about romantic relationships. For example, listening to positive beautiful love songs made a huge impact in my journey to get rid of the limiting beliefs I had about romantic relationships.

 

Please share your stories with us and If you have any suggestions about anything you did to get rid of limiting beliefs affecting your romantic relations, leave them in the comments below.

  
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Saturday, October 12, 2019

Where to Brunch in New York Like the Locals



Where do people put on their cute outfits, leave their house to eat breakfast foods and make a religion out of it? Do not answer that question, it was a rhetorical question. So you want to brunch like a New Yorker?  You have a cute outfit? Sunglasses if you had a long night before or not?  You are ready to brunch like a New Yorker?  Alright, let’s go to the restaurants where New Yorkers brunch!

1. Upland
Located at Park Avenue South, Upland is a New York favorite. They serve delicious food and drinks. The crowd at Upland is very New York with a few savvy tourists. 

2. Friend of a Farmer
When you walk in Friend of a Farmer it feels like you walk home when your mother is cooking a delicious meal because of the dim lights and the odor of savory goodness. I love this place. The food is delicious and tastes fresh. They also have a great selection of juices that I love. Again the crowd here is very New York with a few savvy tourists.

3. Jajajaja NYC
I am not sure how many ja-s are in jajaja but this vegan Mexican place is another New York favorite especially for vegans 🌱 . The drinks are very good as well.

4. By Chloe 
The popular vegan fast food chain has great options for a laid back vegan brunch experience. By Chloe is one of my personal favorite vegan 🌱 restaurants in NYC. I recommend the original Restaurant on Bleecker Street, the one at the Seaport District or the one in Soho on Lafayette Street. The one at 20th Street is not clean at times. The crowd at By Chloe restaurants may be more touristy than all of the other restaurants in this list, thanks to food ordering apps and Uber eats. Believe me when I tell you that most Vegan 🌱 New Yorkers eat By Chloe.

5. The Rooftop Restaurant at Restoration Hardware
The home-furnishing giant got it right with their genius marketing plight, a rooftop bar and restaurant at the top of their beautifully decorated store in the meat packing district is a win! They do not take reservations at this restaurant. The food is quite basic but go for the beautiful decor, drinks and a salad or avocado toast. Peruse the entire store for beautiful decor and design while you wait to be called or after brunch! This rooftop restaurant is absolutely stunning!

Now that you have brunche-d like a New Yorker, you are officially a New Yawkah. Congratulations!



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Friday, October 11, 2019

9 Subtle Things I Did to Become More Feminine


Bonjour, Bonsoir,


Welcome to the blog. Today I am sharing 9 subtle things I did to become more feminine.




I shared the video above on my YouTube Channel a few months ago where I shared 5 things I did to become more feminine but I wanted to update the list and share four additional things that I have been doing on my journey to honing and embracing my feminine side.



1. Stop Swearing


I used to have a potty mouth. I went through a rebellious phase because I grew up in a strict and religious household. When I was on my own I used bad language as a subconscious symbol of freedom. I used to tell myself that I am grown, I can speak how I want but I realized it is not ladylike. I gave up the swearing. There are times when using bad language is necessary and appropriate but using bad language regularly for unnecessary reason is not feminine.

2. Wear More Feminine Colors


Pastel colors, reds, pinks, whites, corals, camel are very feminine colors. Feminine colors are colors that a masculine man would not typically wear. I try to avoid wearing too much masculine colors like black, brown, or navy. I live in New York and I sometimes wear those masculine colors in the winter but when I do, I make sure to rock my red lipstick to add some femininity to the look. I used to hate pink, but I have been slowly incorporating some blush pink into my wardrobe and I absolutely love. Blush pink looks beautiful on every skin and I think every woman should incorporate some blush pink in her closet. I am not a candy pink kind of girl but no other colors make me feel more feminine and girly than pink.

3. Avoid Wearing Masculine Clothes   

I explained this in 2. I want to reiterate that when I do wear black or any masculine colored clothing. I add other feminine touches like a red lipstick. When I wear pants, I wear light and feminine colored pants.

    4. Speaking Slowly

    English is my third language and I get anxious every time I have to speak for a long time. When that happens I rush through the words and sentences to get it over with. I have been learning to take my time to speak slowly and really articulate what I want to say. Rushing is a masculine trait. If you think of any woman that you know who is very feminine, watch how they speak. You will notice that there is a calmness in their voice and the speed at which they speak is usually slow. That is so beautiful and ultra feminine.
5. Speaking Less

I can talk for days. One of my new year’s resolutions for 2019 was to speak less. A true feminine woman speaks when necessary, a lot of time her presence and body language does most of the speaking for her.

    6. Smiling More
A smile is very feminine and beautiful. It brightens up everyone’s faces. I usually smile when I am taking photos because I am usually goofing around and joking with my friends or photographers but when I am alone, commuting and there is no one to speak or engage with my resting face could be intimidating. I have been making a conscious effort to smile at strangers.


    7. Walking Slowly
If you live in a big fast paced city like New York where I live it is daunting to walk slowly in a crowd of runners and rushers. Nothing screams feminine more than a slow, sexy walk, lol… I try to do it as often as possible especially when I am wearing heels. I leave my house early so that I give myself enough time to walk slowly instead of running or rushing to my destinations.

8. Wearing Heels Everyday


I know it sounds daunting but I have been wearing heels since I was a teenager and I absolutely love the way it makes me look taller, it makes my bum and legs look nice and toned. At some point I got lazy and stopped wearing heels and I blamed it on getting older. Now I make sure I wear heels everyday even if it is just a kitten heel.
9. Looking People in the Eye

I grew up in Haiti and looking people in the eye can be considered rude as a child. I kept that same mentally as an adult. In America where I currently live, it is very important to look people in the eye, it is a sign of respect and confidence.




If you have any subtle things that you have done to become more feminine, please share in the comments below. We would love to learn from you.


Au-Revoir,
Deb


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Monday, September 16, 2019

Why Every Classy Woman Needs a Silk or Satin Camisole in her Closet Featuring Aritzia Satin Cami | Classy Closet Essentials



Silk or satin camisoles are a staple in my closet because they are so versatile, I love to pair them with my favorite suits, a skirt or a pair of trousers but today I am going to share the number one reason why every classy woman should have one in her closet.


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You Can't Give Up Now | Motivation Monday



Dear entrepreneurs, creatives, side hustlers,

 

Are the numbers on social media discouraging you? I wanted to share an interview that Randy Jackson did on Impact Theory with Tom Bilyeu which helps to remind us why we must keep going even when the numbers are not in our favor or what we want them to be. Sometimes we get caught up with the numbers, what our peers are doing and forget that we do what we do because we are creators. The interview is packed with a lot of wisdom and knowledge but the one that stood out to me the most was when he was speaking about the difference between a star and a singer. He said something to the effect of a star doesn’t stop if people do not like his song, he just sings his song because that’s what a star does.

 

The numbers on Instagram have been very discouraging to me and every time I look at the likes and comments versus the quality of my comment, I have to remind myself that I am just singing my song and I do not stop because of instragram’s numbers.



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Thursday, September 12, 2019

Classy First Date Outfits to Secure the 2nd and 3rd Date



In todays’ article, we are sharing classy style tips and outfit inspiration that will secure the 2nd and 3rd date. There is more to explore when it comes to securing a second or third date beyond your outfit but appearance is a very big part of it and one that we can control.

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Wednesday, September 4, 2019

5 American Brands that Sell Feminine Work Clothes



It can be hard finding feminine and elegant work clothes in a market of fast and trendy fashion. I created a list of my five favorite American brands that sell feminine work clothes.
1. White House Black Market

White House Black Market is one of my absolute favorite stores for classy and feminine women’s work clothes. The cut of their blazers, the silhouette in their tops and dresses are very powerful yet feminine and sophisticated. A lot of their blazers do not have a normal lapel but a neckline which resembles that of a dress. Some of their blazers have a great peplum detail at the end which adds that extra feminine touch. I love that they always stock feminine colors like a great pink, peach, red with some classic neutral colors. 99% of my suits including the one that I am wearing are from White House Black Market.
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Tuesday, September 3, 2019

Loving-Kindness Meditation for Self-Love and the Love of Others



Meditation is a huge part of my daily routine. I meditate at least twice daily, when I wake up and when I go to bed. Some days I feel negative energy in and around me. For example when I observe myself making mean comments internally about others or when someone pisses me off. On those days I do a “loving-kindness meditation” also known as a metta bhavana meditation in addition to my regular meditations. Today, I am sharing my favorite loving kindness meditation.

 
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Wednesday, August 28, 2019

How To Find The Perfect Hairstyle For Your Face Shape and Facial Features



I speak a lot about being well-groomed and hair is a very important part of your grooming. In this article, we will not only discuss the importance of well-groomed hair but also how to find the perfect hairstyle for your face shape and facial features. I want to preface this by saying that this is not a political blog and I do not use my hair to make any political statements, all I care about when it comes to my hairstyle is what I believe looks good on me.





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Tuesday, August 27, 2019

What I am Buying For Fall 2019



Every season, I look for certain key pieces to add to my wardrobe. Today, I am sharing what I will be picking up this fall.

 

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Wednesday, August 21, 2019

How To Cut Down Get Ready Time | It Takes Too Long To Look Put Together



I can hear some of you behind your phone or computer screens saying, Deb It’s great and all to look put together and presentable at all times but it takes too long to get ready in the morning. This article will help you build a system that will help you cut down on your Get Ready Time.



Wardrobe

One of the biggest things that a lot people struggle with when getting ready is putting together an outfit. My best secret for always coming with a winner outfit every time is having a capsule wardrobe that is carefully curated for my body type with colors that suit me very well. Wikipedia defines a capsule wardrobe as a collection of a few essential items of clothing that do not go out of fashion such as skirts, trousers, and Coats which can be augmented with seasonal pieces. I’d add dresses, shoes, bags and accessories to that list as well. I love dresses, they are very feminine and I feel they are needed in every woman’s wardrobe. Dresses are also very easy to style just pick a pair of shoes and a bag and you’re good to go. When creating your capsule wardrobe, you want to pick a color scheme, preferably classic colors and colors that suit you very well and only purchase items within that color scheme and/or items that complement one another. For example my wardrobe consists of neutral colors, whites, beige, black, grey with a pop of red and blush pink. I can create any combination with these colors at any time and it is guaranteed to be a winning outfit combination because all of these colors complement one another.
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Tuesday, August 20, 2019

Let's Talk About Dignity and Self-Respect



In today’s article, I will attempt to drive home the idea that the way we dress, groom and carry ourselves is a reflection of the level of dignity and self-respect we have.
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Thursday, August 15, 2019

Turn Off the TV | I'll Teach You How To Be Free



One of my many callings in life is to inspire personal freedom or activate the desire to achieve personal freedom. Today, I am going to share one of the very crucial steps I took down the rabbit hole to start my journey to personal freedom.



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